Here I am heading towards a nice bonus at work after a very tumultous career year, and hubby's job now includes flight benefits (which we thought were gone forever....whole 'nother story). So I'm thinking, cool, good year for a ski trip with the girls. Except the "girls" are my friend, her sister, and her sister's friend. And my friend is going on a cruise and then having shoulder surgery that has a long recovery. Screech....there goes the ski trip.
Or does it? I found a "Ski Camp" just for women in Utah. Looks like a good growth experience seeing as how I'm a low intermediate chicken of a skier with delusions of grandeur AND a strong introvert. I rarely fall because I take very few risks. I only ski about once every 3 years, but dream of it often. This camp is for intermediate to advanced skiers and I will likely be outclassed. It says you will be encouraged to go to the next level. Four days of on-mountain instruction and challenge, demos, opportunities to learn to telemark or snowshoe, yoga in the mornings, tips from pros, welcome cocktails, closing banquet. Sounds overwhelming in a way, but somehow I'm drawn to it (is this like a mosquito heading for the bug zapper?).
So why am I hesitating? It's expensive and I've tried to play the "thrifty spouse" card. But my incredible hubby says go for it. I thought work might be a problem, but I got the days off approved today. Everyone I have asked is encouraging me to go.
So is part of it diabetes? What if....I get up there all by myself and have a severe low? How will my BG's react to 4 days of very different activity? What basal rate will I use? What if I crash and burn and ruin my pump? What if I have a series of lows, have to stop to eat and recover and slow the group down? What if....I get hurt, and noone knows how to take care of me and my diabetes?
All of these are thoughts I would not have had before diabetes. So I have to wonder.... how many of my life choices are being shaped by it? Will I let this be one of them?