Thursday, March 25, 2010

Why this but not that?

I work as a CPA, but do not prepare federal income tax returns as part of my work. Never have; I just don't want to specialize in that. Around this time of year, as April 15th approaches, lots of well meaning friends express concern about "how busy you must be this time of year". This is in spite of me having told many of them previously that I don't do taxes. I do not find this to be upsetting at all, and have plenty of patience and grace to extend to those friends, as I'm sure they extend to me on other things.

Contrast that with how I feel when those same well meaning friends make comments about my diabetes. You know what I'm talking about....things like "oh, I forgot, you can't eat that, can you?", or "you need to eat your lunch right on time, don't you?" That in spite of me having told them previously that Type 1 diabetes is not so much about what I cannot eat or when I eat (thanks to my pump), but about matching insulin with what I do eat and my activity level. Why do those questions still cause a flood of emotions, and leave me often reliving the comment long after it is made? I do my best to extend grace to those friends, and in my head realize it's unrealistic to expect them to remember much about my diabetes. But it's a battle to fight through those initial emotions to get there sometimes.

Both are sterotypes of sorts, but one leaves me feeling judged, and the other does not. How about you, have you found a dichotomy in how you respond to D related comments vs. comments about other aspects of your life?

1 comment:

Scott K. Johnson said...

What an interesting question, and example!

I don't have any real examples, but I am SURE that I'm hyper-sensitive about diabetes discussion. I'm especially sure of that when the discussion is of MY diabetes!